Category Archives: bible

what it’s like quitting christianity

I’ve said before, I don’t identify as Christian anymore, and I don’t believe in the Bible. I’m not sure what I believe about some things still, but I know I’m not a Christian and I thought i would share a few more specifics of  leaving my faith.
I was saved at age 5 (or four?) on September third. I grew up grateful and loving Jesus, and full of zeal. I wanted to live a radical life. I even cowrote a magazine with my now-husband.
But I’ve always had some questions. As I got older, I tried a different variety of Christianity. I tried many. When I was younger I was afraid of losing my faith and going to hell. Despite believing the bible was true I’ve never been sure I could be sure I was saved – I was afraid of losing it and going to hell. Then I discovered Calvinism – which helped me with it’s always-saved doctrine. There were still issues, but I accepted John Piper’s answers to my questions even as I was upset believing that the majority of the world was predestined to Hell. I was not sure HOW a good God could do that, but the Bible said God was Good and that settled it.

I lived in a tension of questioning and believing; I was advised to put questions ‘too big’ for me on hold, and instead say like the disciples, ‘Lord, you have the words of life, where else could I go?’

I did. For years I did. Until, things just didn’t add up any more. Too many people were ‘filled with the Holy Spirit’, but unkind, judgmental, even abusive. Too much sexual and spiritual abuse in the church. Too many Christians rejoicing at ‘god’s will’ during a tragedy. Too little of God when I called out. Too little love for homosexuals or pro-choicers. Too little understanding for those who interpreted scriptures differently.

I wondered if the words were really the words of life.
I left our old church. (Wordlessly, I regret that. I never meant to hurt anyone but I probably did. I was waiting for my husband to talk to the pastor before I talked about anything, because I was still clinging to bits of patriarchy at the time and didn’t want to speak out of turn, as a woman.)
I tried to find something left to cling too, some reason I could be confident that the Bible was trustworthy, God was real, and Jesus existed and loved me.
But there were too many discrepancies in the scripture I was taught was infallible, too many spiritual experiences by the non-christian, too little evidence the gospels were real – all things causing me to let go.

I wanted them to be real. I wanted to be loved by an Almighty God. After all, I’d spent my whole life trying to please Him by obedience, and being taught that Christianity was the one true path.
Of course, I didn’t want to believe the whole world was going to hell except the ones who believe in Jesus. I was taught it had to be true and that’s why we had to be missionaries. But i felt, like others have said, that we were saving people *from god*. Finally that became a bigger issue to me.
I read Rob Bell. I became confident that if God is real and really Love, then there’s no hell like the hell I was taught.
I studied evolution and Genesis and concluded that if God is real, He managed creation rather than created everything in 6 days like in the creation myth.

But still, the IF.
I read and thought and studied and – I didn’t pray any more. I didn’t feel right praying.
I tried to cling. I really wanted to believe. For a few months I read books from different perspectives of Christianity like crazy.  Crazy Love. Love Wins. Disappointment with God by Philip Yancey. The Ragamuffin Gospel (a friend suggested I turn it into a paper wreath, but it was pretty good). Knowing God. Jesus Without Religion. something or nother by AW Tozer.
Oh, and The Bible.
Drank them like water, only the water tasted funny and left me dry.

Then I studied other religions and found that parts of the Bible sound like other myths. Not like anything especially breathed by the Almighty.
In exhaustion and desperation, I decided to stop for awhile. I figured that if it were really true and I was hunting for truth, I’d come back to it, and I read some books by athiests.
And… I don’t know. I don’t want a world with no God, no redemption, but for all my fighting I just can’t make myself believe something i don’t, simply because it’d be nice to have a loving God up there caring.
I am an agnostic. I’ve changed my mind on Christianity, maybe forever, maybe not. I think there’s a chance there’s some benevolent force or being out there, but after investigating, I don’t think I have a reason to believe it’s the God of the Bible.
I sometimes wonder if there’s something no one really understands, and all the religious writings out there are simply humanity’s attempts to understand it. Or maybe there’s nothing, and we just want there to be.

I can’t make myself believe something I don’t believe, that I don’t feel is worth believing.

I felt bereft, for awhile. sometimes I still do.
I lost a great deal, in leaving Christianity. The respect of other good Christian friends, the one thing I have in common with practically everyone I know, the confidence of knowing I had the truth no matter what, even the knowledge that i was fulfilling my parents hopes for me.

I open myself up to being told I was never a true christian. I’ve heard people speak of athiests and agnostics as people who want to be able to sin and who deny God to ‘follow after fleshly lusts’ and now that’s gonna be me (hint: it’s a lie).
I lose my part with the majority of Americans (over 70% identify as Christian)
I’m liable to be love bombed and ‘prayed for’ to return, whether I want it or not.
People are going to think I failed. Like I simply had it wrong all along or ‘lost’ my faith.
There are people who can reconcile heart, head, and faith in God. I understand that. Personally, I couldn’t. At least not right now.
For the sake of staying true to my heart and my head, I had to let it go.

…for now I camp in the space of questions, questions as infinite as the stars and I am full of questions and starlight.

Christians, stop the prayer pushing evangelizing

Seriously, don’t do this:

When the optometrist told me that I wasn’t taking Jesus seriously enough, I nodded numbly, years of silent accommodation informing me. He told me hell wasn’t something to be taken lightly. He never bothered to ask me if I believed in hell; I don’t.

When he asked me if I wanted to pray for forgiveness for owning a bag that depicted hell, I must have choked out a scared noise that he took for assent. One of the technicians locked the door, and they all pulled their rolling chairs close around me.

This is creepy, and abuse of the power of a doctor-patient relationshio, and not a loving way to talk about Jesus or to treat people. I don’t think anyone should ever be pushed or guilted into saying a prayer.
I can just imagine the optometrist sharing this story at church as a triumph for god, another soul saved, praise the Lord.

but the reality is a woman turned off from christianity after being trapped in frightening situation by people who claimed to care about her soul, but showed no care for her as a person.

You can’t separate the soul from the person. to act like the soul is all that matters is a gnostic view of life and christianity.
you need to love the whole person – body, mind, emotions – apart from what that person believes about God.
I am a questioning post-christian. When I feel like people are saying and doing things just to make me ‘return to the truth’, i get very upset. I want to be loved and liked as a person, we all do.
you can’t tell someone to pray to jesus and have life, and then leave them hungry, empty, hurting, or lonely. you can’t put the rest of their problems on hold while you try to bring them in, or back into, the fold.
in Christianity, i have been judged, condemned, criticized, and told to conform with all sorts of rules extrapolated from the bible, all with the view of making sure my soul is right with god. But you can’t separate a soul out from a person (if indeed the soul even exists). The whole person matters.
the whole person needs fed, loved, educated, and befriended. praying for my soul and neglecting me as an entire hurting but funny, kind, very complex person is… Frankly, it’s insulting and hurtful and a huge turnoff to your ‘loving’ god.

And it isn’t what Jesus was like.

modesty – a roundup of posts and thoughts

It’s summer time. Time for the big swimsuit question.
As a woman who used to swim in athletic shirts and an athletic top to ensure proper modesty, i know what the modesty teachings are. However, I don’t agree with them anymore.
I feel that modesty culture demeans and harms both men and women, promotes unhealthy thoughts, and operates based on stereotypes and misunderstandings.
I’m posting links to some posts on the subject, along with highlights, and my thoughts will follow.

There’s been this post about modesty and The Bikini Question making the rounds, (it’s down right now, cached page here)and it feels very rape culturey. Defeating the Dragons explains how it promotes rape culture, as well as how futile it is for a women to try to dress in a way that certain men won’t objectify her.

But, this article, like every other article I’ve read on modesty, emphasizes that it a woman’s obligation to help protect men from our bodies. It’s our duty to make sure that we make it possible for men to forget that we’re a woman– which is, frankly, impossible. I don’t care how loose your clothes are– if you have T&A, there’s no getting rid of it, there’s no hiding it.

emily joy allison talks modesty and purity culture in her new post about How To Be a Lady:

LET’S GO AHEAD AND TIE A WOMAN’S CHARACTER DIRECTLY TO HER CLOTHING WHY DON’T WE. Yeah. That seems like a good idea. Also let’s shame women who’ve been disrespected or mistreated by men by making them think it must have been their fault somehow for wearing the “wrong” clothes and attracting the “wrong” kind of men. And to top it all off let’s pretend like Christian men do (and should) actually treat women better who “appropriately cover themselves.”

Another good post about the problems for both men and women inherent in modesty teachings:

Shaney Irene has this post about Why The Modesty Survey was a Bad Idea (for the record, Shaney, I forgive you 😀 i’m thankful that you are writing against it now.)

In offering a platform to over 1600 guys, many of whom shouldn’t have been given it, we lent legitimacy to some very dangerous ideas.

Many guys admitted to losing respect for girls who didn’t live up to their ideas of modesty, feeling “disgusted” or “angered” by these same girls, and even going so far as to say, “…she loses her right to ask guys to stop looking at her like something to be had…you are asking to have guys stare at you.” The word “cause” in relation to guys’ lust also made a frequent appearance.

and now for my thoughts:

I feel like the biggest problem with the modesty culture is the confusion between lust and attraction. i never once have heard anyone make a distinction. It’s as though it’s a sin for a man to notice a woman is attractive.
Look, people. i’m visual. And the dude who plays Thor is attractive. I noticed. That’s not cheating on my husband. that’s not me wanting to rape the actor. That’s just me, noticing a very attractive guy is attractive. I’ve seen men that were so attractive, it makes me blush. For real. It doesn’t mean i’m lusting. I am not fantasizing. I wouldn’t ‘do’ anything with him.
But there’s nothing wrong with me or the guy, if i notice he’s attractive. If I start having sexual fantasies, that’d be objectifying and mentally unhealthy.
Here’s big secret: women can be visual, too. I’m more visually oriented than Luke. And there are a lot of guys objectively more attractive (and by that I mean, with really ripped abs) than him. it’s okay. i still find him breathtakingly handsome and i love him more than anybody. He’s the only dude i intend to ever [expletive deleted] with. But I’m gonna notice Batman’s biceps. And it is okay. And anything beyond that is my responsibility to deal with.

The flipside of that is, if a guy sees me in a bikini and notices i’m attractive, or more likely, notices i am very curvy, there is nothing wrong with that. I AM very curvy. No suit is gonna hide that.
If he ogles me – and I have been ogled while dressed modestly before and my young and frightened response was to dress rather more frumpily and blame it on my ‘accidental immodesty’ – that is all on him. It’s not my job to try my hardest to dress in such a way that people will treat me with respect; and as noted in many of the blogs above, it DOES NOT WORK; oglers are pretty much oglers. As far as keeping a man from sinning – him noticing I am a woman isn’t going to ‘make’ him sin.

And if a woman judges me as a slut because i’m a curvy woman in a bikini, that’s all on her too.

So much for my opinions on modesty culture in general, now for the chocolate cake analogy in the post, which many people think is wonderful. I found it a problematic analogy. It made me angry that a woman enjoying herself at the beach – happening to bare a midriff rather than not (perhaps because she can’t find a well fitting one piece or tankini, perhaps because she likes how she looks, who knows) is considered the same as following a dieter around with something tempting.
I am a person, dressing for me. It would be more like if i ate a cake at a cafe and you walked up and shoved your face into it and ate it all up, and blamed me for you stealing it, because i should be tempting you with my cake in public.
Unless I am deliberately and provocatively and obviously flirting with someone, he has no reason to think my clothing is an invitation to him. (and even then he STILL wouldn’t have any right to touch me without a clear verbal invitation or permission).

I am planning to go to the lake this summer, and i will be wearing my bikini. partially in protest, but mostly because it’s flattering, comfortable, stays in place better than any suit i have, and will allow my body to get some sun, and there’s really no reason for me not to, if i’m comfortable in it.
Dianna Anderson is joining the bikini club too. (For the record, i have another suit i’ll be wearing when we go to the inlaws to swim, out of courtesy to their beliefs and because i would be the only one in a bikini, and i’m not comfortable with that.)

comment section: am I missing any good posts in my links? did you read the bikini article? do you have a cute new swimsuit you’re excited to wear? i got a polka dotted tankini for everydays, and a black bikini, with full cups and gathers in the fabric, for the lake.

(edit: Sarah over the Moon wrote a post about modesty today too, responding to another post about modesty from a bit of a different angle than the first, but the points about the problems and inequity of translating clothing into ‘messages’ still stand. worth a read)
(Another edit: here’s a post from one of my favorite bloggers, Libby Anne, about the problematic chocolate cake analogy, focusing on chocolate cake’s inability to consent, and the lack of clarity as to what the anologue to eating the cake is: attraction? Lust? Rape?)

Humor, satire, sexism, and women

This week Prodigal posted an article – it was intended to be humorous  – by a christian comedian John Crist. It was directed toward women (‘girls’ and ‘ladies’ actually) and although it was titled ‘my dating manifesto’ the gist of it was ‘why you don’t have a boyfriend’. (a manifesto is generally a personal/group declaration of policy and aims. Something for yourself and your group, not prescriptive for a different group.)

If it hadn’t come across as so sexist and condescending, if he had written it differently, it could have been an interesting piece on dating in the digital age. The first part was in fact poked fun at a digital relationship he’d been in, and it made me laugh.
When we got to his list about ‘girls’ (I think the word he is looking for is woman; i believe he’s too old to date a minor), well, that’s when it went south.
After reactions, Prodigal removed the article from their site, but you can view a cached version of the page here
People started tweeting both support and accusations of sexism at Jon Crist. He defended his article by saying people are mad he was writing the truth, and that it was satire – implying both it is wrong to be mad at humor, and that he is being persecuted.
I think the biggest problem was that the target of his humor was a part if our culture he doesn’t understand very well. If he had been talking to men, the potential for humor would have been greater. Not to mention it could have been an actual manifesto. He does briefly address men, but mostly he talks about why women’s – er, girls – online presences do frequently make them look undatable – as though twitter or Instagram – and life in general – should be more about prospective suitors than communicating with friends. The article included the line ‘Ladies, you’re never going to make it to a true life relationship if you keep screwing up false life.’
By ‘screwing up’ he apparently means things like duck-faced pictures, pictures of manicures, and lots of abbreviations – basically general ‘girl stuff’.

It wasn’t really funny, to me. He seemed serious about what the ladies are doing wrong to get his attention. Although if he were trying to write satirically, he could have pushed this a little further and had a good satire piece about how people mock innocuous stuff and ridiculing culture pressure on women to walk a fine line between sexy/fun and modest/holy. There’s no indication that’s what he was going for, though. Instead, he used satire to mock women.

Rachel Held Evans wrote an excellent piece about satire, and I think it partly explains why John Crist’s piece came across as so offensive to many readers (men and women, actually):

Satire only works when its most stinging indictments are directed toward the powerful. This is why attempts at satire fall on their face when they make the weak their target.  For example, the writers at The Onion are usually great at satire, but they blew it with the Quvenzhané Wallis tweet, because it just doesn’t work when the subject of a c-word joke is a nine-year-old girl. Same goes for Daniel Tosh, who is a funny guy and all, but who probably should avoid making jokes about rape.

The rule of thumb: Pick on someone your own size, or bigger…never on someone smaller. And don’t take cheap shots. 

And we should be eager to share the good news that, in the Kingdom that lasts, the guy on the donkey is Lord. 

For him to pick on women – who aren’t even allowed to speak in front of mixed groups in most churches – is for him to direct his ‘wit’ at people who have less of a voice than he does. Furthermore, he is imposing his arbitrary values about what women should be like in order to be respected on to women – men are the norm and women are the ‘other’ that should conform. although i am rather unskilled as a feminist apologist, it’s easy for me to see that this is sexist. And anyone who got mad about this on twitter was called a ‘man basher’.

I don’t think this kind of satire does anything to help anyone. It does nothing but put more expectations on women and assert men’s view over women.

This isn’t a subject where a man should poke fun at a woman, it’s a place where a man should listen.
It’s hard being a woman in christianity ya’ll. When I dress, I have to worry, will I look too ‘frumpy/too modest’, or will I look like a ‘slut/inviting men to lust’? I used to throw away clothes that flattered my figured because i had read and heard enough to know that if i got raped, it would be blamed on me. I thought if I looked plain enough, I would be safe from rape and from drawing attention (and therefore maybe accidentally ‘inviting’ rape) by looking too homeschoolery. Men, in general, cannot know first hand what that is like, and unless they listen carefully when women try to tell them, they will never has a clue.
Unfortunately men seem to view that kind of thing disdainfully, as feminist propaganda.

As a woman, people expect I will be emotional and therefore irrational (false dichotomy between rational and emotional, btw) because of my femaleness. Therefore, in a conversation with men, I have to be more even-toned, more logical, and more factually informed than them. Any tone indicating I am upset, and i am an ‘irrational female’. My brothers would pick on me, get in my face, and call me a retard, and when i got mad they would ask ‘are you on your period?’ – that’s irrelevant, I was mad because they were being assholes! but because I am an ‘irrational girl’, they can disregard their own part in riling me up. “Lana just cries a lot” my dad warned my husband. Because girls cry. He was the sensible one, my brothers were the standard for normal behavior, and i was the girl – the ‘Other’.

Men can get mad without it being attributed to their gender.  If women call men sexist, the men frequently say ‘No i’m not, i’m telling the truth, and you’re a man-basher’.   (I DID see some men defending women on twitter, and I saw another man who started out agreeing with John Crist, but who took the time to understand WHY women were upset and then I think he understood. I appreciated that. Not all men are like the men I am describing.)

These are some of the things (straight, white, cisgendered) men do not even have to think about, because culture accepts the straight white male as the norm, the objective and rational.
I’m sure ya’ll dudes have your problems too, and I am willing to listen to them. In fact, I hear a lot of them already just as the normal ‘problems with life’. but i can listen more. But, please, listen to women, listen to the people you consider ‘other’. We have experiences you do not understand, and by not taking the time or having the compassion to listen and try to understand, you can perpetuate harmful gender stereotypes and hurt a lot of women, and never even know you are doing it. And when someone says, ‘that’s sexist’ (or racist, or homophobic, or whatever – this goes for all the ‘Others’), please consider that there are things you don’t understand, and cannot understand until you put aside your ideas that you are more right than everyone, and just listen to the people that christian society has marginalized.

The Great and Perilous Day of Judgment

And lo when they stand before the throne in the great and perilous day of judgment, the judge will separate  them, and to those on his left he will say, you did not spank your children. You did not punish them for throwing a fit when you were at walmart.

And they will reply, ‘but my children were exhausted and we were out too late so I showed understanding’

But he will say to them ‘ I wanted you to teach holiness and provide a witness of perfection. Depart from me for I love you but do not like you right now never knew you.

 And he will say ‘you showed leniency in forcing people to conform to scripture. You accepted homosexuals, and those with gender confusion. You supported those seeking unholy matrimony and put red equals signs on your web pages. Do you not know that to  identify with those who do wrong is as the sin of eating with tax collectors and prostitutes?’

Then he will say, ‘Depart from me for I never knew you.’

And to others he will say, ‘you did not push little children to forgive their abusers immediately and face-to-face. It would be better for you to have a millstone hung around your neck than to allow any little one to delay in forgiving his molestor. Depart from me you stumbling stones’

And they will say ‘But, Lord, we believed in you and followed you”

But he will say, “if you did these things, obviously you were not truly mine”.
And they will depart and burn in Hades forever for their evil deeds.

If anyone does not condemn these sins, he too deserves the fires of hell.

On reading a book by the anti-christ

Actually, the book was Love Wins, by Rob Bell. But after the trailer for the book came out, people said he was a heretic, a wolf in sheep’s clothing, and an anti-christ.

So, shortly before Easter, I read it. I wanted answers. The idea that everyone in the world not fortunate enough to have heard the gospel and be able to believe it is going to hell (and that this is an indicator of God’s goodness and justice), was becoming hard to swallow. Add on to this, many Christians believe that people have to have heard a specific telling, with some elements, like sin nature, being more prominent than others, like heaven, or the conversion can’t be real, so many people might only *think* they believe. This further limits the number of people who aren’t going to be tortured in a lake of fire for all eternity. Also, how could I be sure I was one of the fortunate few, and not one of the unfortunate who only *thought* they were following Jesus? and even if I were, what about the rest of the world?

So I read Rob Bell’s book.
He definitely seems to be an inclusivist.

Which makes him an evil, satanic, heretic?

Have the people so mad about this actually read the book? I was expecting, from all the anger, to see him deny Christ ever resurrected, or to deny hell in a way that meant there was no justice, neither of which he does.

I think it’s strange for people to preach a god of amazing, shocking grace and love, and then throw metaphorical stones when someone suggests that god is much more full of grace and love than they think.

Why is hell and eternal torture for people who aren’t Christians – ‘true’ Christians – such a vital doctrine to (most) evangelicals?

excellent post: This One’s For the Homeschool Moms

I read a thought provoking and insightful post on Homeschoolers Anonymous today, gently warning homeschool parents about getting sucked in to legalistic, formulaic parenting and fundamentalist religion through the homeschool movement, and along the way reminding many readers that their parents were under intense pressure, too.

…the homeschool movement told my mom that they had given her the magic formula to make her children’s lives perfect. They give her a list, and promised her that if she followed the rules that her children would be perfect, Godly, and never experience life’s pain. How could that not be a tempting promise to any parent who cares about their children?

Homeschool moms, I want to tell you that promise is false, and that believing it is going to hurt you. Your child is a sovereign individual, and no matter how carefully and lovingly you arrange every part of their upbringing, education, and socialization, you cannot control their future. You can’t control it because you don’t have total control over your child or other people. If you’re stressing yourself out, afraid you’re doing it wrong, and a constant bundle of nerves, I want you to take a moment and think about whether or not you have set unrealistic expectations for yourself as a parent, and your child as a child. You probably have, and I want to tell you to give yourself a break.Also, a lot of you have commented on these posts explaining that you’re different from the “crazy” homeschool moms, and I do believe you, but chances are if you’re Christian and homeschooling, you and your kids will be interacting with fundamentalists and you may be gradually sucked into parts or the whole of their ideology over time. These are some warning signs that could cause you to be more susceptible or signal that you’re already being sucked in:

via This One’s For The Homeschool Moms: Mercy’s Story.

That Proverbs thirty-one B*tch

The Proverbs 31 woman is… Golly. I don’t know. I hate her. She’s that perfect, tanned, accomplished, musical, impeccably dressed, shapely mom of several children who are cleaner than your two and don’t climb up the slides or throw mulch at the park. The P31 woman runs a business from home and still manages to have a clean house and feed her family well rounded meals with organic vegetables and grain fed meat. She probably has a freezer full of delicious meals to take to people from church at a moment’s notice, perhaps she even organizes the meal train.

She gets up early to have quiet time, she never yells, her children have dozens of bible passages memorized and the family recites the book of James before lunch every day.

Her husband is trim and well clothed because she feeds him a perfect diet and gets up early enough to choose and iron his clothes every day.

He’s very happy because while the P31 woman is demure and meek in public she’s incredibly good in bed, with great frequency and she never ever has any pain or emotional problems or if she does they don’t affect her performance at all.

And you can be just like the proverbs 31 woman, if you work hard enough and trust God enough, because this is God’s will for you, so the only thing standing in the way of you being just like her, is your own evil sin nature.

…. The proverbs 31 woman would also be the perfect friend, if any woman could stand her.

And of course, if she existed.

Ah, my nemesis. my old nemesis. Used by many people as an example of all the things i am doing wrong – or not doing at all and ought to be. A picture of many things i probably never could do or be, but apparently ought to be in order to please God and deserve my husband’s praise.

When I came to the chapter about her in Rachel Held Evans book A Year of Biblical Womanhood, i had a panic attack (the proverbs 31 woman would never start shaking, hyperventilating, and seeing flashes of lights at the mere mention of a figure of ‘encouragement’, i am sure).

It wasn’t the way she was written about. It was just that she was there. An image of all the ways i fail, all the time. And despite that Rachel was clearly saying the proverbs 31 woman should NOT be used this way i still had to put the book down for awhile. i took me a couple week, but after putting down the proverbs 31 woman, the perfect woman and my arch nemesis, i was able to pick up the idea of a blessing:


“So do Jewish women struggle with this passage as much as Christian women?” I asked.

Ahava seemed a bit bewildered.

“Not at all!” she said. “In my culture, Proverbs 31 is a blessing.”

Ahava repeated what I’d discovered in my research, that the first line of the Proverbs 31 poem—“a virtuous woman who can find?”—is best translated, “a woman of valor who can find?” And in fact, the structure and diction employed in the poem more closely resembles that of a heroic poem celebrating the exploits of a warrior than a domestic to-do list. Like all good poems, it was intended to highlight the glory of the everyday; it was never meant to be used prescriptively as a to-do list or a command.

Now, i’m still not ready to hang the chapter on my wall. But with the description of the poem as a blessing to woman of valor – not only to perfect models – but including me, doing my best with what i have – I might eventually be able to flip to the end of proverbs without hating myself. I might FEEL like a woman of valor someday.

Eschet Chayil, Rachel Held Evans. The blessing of Proverbs 31 was taken from me (both by others teachings and my own perfectionism), and a burden was left in it’s place. Thanks for writing to lift the burden and restore the blessing. You’re a woman of valor

And so am I.

P.S. A Year of Biblical Womanhood is only nine bucks on amazon right now, sweet!